conversations with todd
Aug. 14th, 2006 08:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
georion23todd and i got to talk for a long time this evening after he got back from two weeks of army training in california.
heather: did you go to that bbq thing with the army people yesterday?
todd: no! i had just spent two weeks with those people! i didn't want to hang out with them and their stupid families!
heather: aren't you awol if you don't go?
todd: well yeah...
heather: you could tell them you were sick. tell them you had food poisoning and describe to them the colors of what was coming out of both ends.
todd: ugh, you're going to make me sick just by talking about it.
heather: i thought army people were supposed to have strong stomachs so when they see people getting their heads blown off, they don't puke.
todd: well yeah, that's true. but we try to avoid that.
heather: what, puking or getting your head blown off?
todd: um...both, actually.
todd: what are you doing?
heather: eating.
todd: i'm sitting on the roof not wearing any pants.
< later >
todd: what are you doing?
heather: eating.
todd: no! you're not playing the game. make up something outrageous!
heather: okay, i'm driving around topless with the windows down. in the rain.
todd: oh yeah? i'm eating macaroni and cheese off my bare chest.
talking about ways to freak out his new freshman roommate:
todd: i can wake up screaming in the middle of the night that someone is trying to kill me and keep a big knife under my pillow so i can whip it out like if i was in iraq. what would scare you?
heather: you sitting on the roof not wearing any pants.
todd: no, really, what would scare you if you were a freshman?
heather: you eating macaroni and cheese off your bare chest.
todd: wait, me eating it off my chest or you eating it off of yours?
heather: you eating it off yours. me eating it off of myself would be hot.
todd: i agree.
todd: i could take my big knife with me everywhere. and use it to do everything! like turning on lights and stuff!
heather: like homer on the simpsons when he was in the gun club and he used his gun to do everything, even turning on the tv?
todd: yes!! and if he tells anyone and tries to get me committed to a mental hospital i'd threaten him with the big knife.
heather: yeah, you're going to get yourself expelled.
todd: i could play the race card.
heather: but you're white...
todd: exactly! so i should be able to do whatever i want!
heather: yeah, i don't think it works that way...sorry.
todd: i think i want to be a professional solitaire player...
heather: oh yeah, that's the way to impress the ladies.
todd: well, i don't have to tell them what i do; i'll just say i'm a professional.
heather: and they'll be like, "a professional what?"
todd: damnit, this game sucks. i'm quitting.
heather: now, that's no way to be a professional.
trying out chris' online game:
todd: this is really hard
heather: is your head going to explode?
todd: yes, and someone's going to see it and throw up.
< later >
todd: i'm actually doing another puzzle. they're actually not that hard.
heather: cool.
todd: i guess you just have to be a genius to do them.
heather: your modesty is overwhelming.
todd: i know it is.
hehe. good times
heather: did you go to that bbq thing with the army people yesterday?
todd: no! i had just spent two weeks with those people! i didn't want to hang out with them and their stupid families!
heather: aren't you awol if you don't go?
todd: well yeah...
heather: you could tell them you were sick. tell them you had food poisoning and describe to them the colors of what was coming out of both ends.
todd: ugh, you're going to make me sick just by talking about it.
heather: i thought army people were supposed to have strong stomachs so when they see people getting their heads blown off, they don't puke.
todd: well yeah, that's true. but we try to avoid that.
heather: what, puking or getting your head blown off?
todd: um...both, actually.
todd: what are you doing?
heather: eating.
todd: i'm sitting on the roof not wearing any pants.
< later >
todd: what are you doing?
heather: eating.
todd: no! you're not playing the game. make up something outrageous!
heather: okay, i'm driving around topless with the windows down. in the rain.
todd: oh yeah? i'm eating macaroni and cheese off my bare chest.
talking about ways to freak out his new freshman roommate:
todd: i can wake up screaming in the middle of the night that someone is trying to kill me and keep a big knife under my pillow so i can whip it out like if i was in iraq. what would scare you?
heather: you sitting on the roof not wearing any pants.
todd: no, really, what would scare you if you were a freshman?
heather: you eating macaroni and cheese off your bare chest.
todd: wait, me eating it off my chest or you eating it off of yours?
heather: you eating it off yours. me eating it off of myself would be hot.
todd: i agree.
todd: i could take my big knife with me everywhere. and use it to do everything! like turning on lights and stuff!
heather: like homer on the simpsons when he was in the gun club and he used his gun to do everything, even turning on the tv?
todd: yes!! and if he tells anyone and tries to get me committed to a mental hospital i'd threaten him with the big knife.
heather: yeah, you're going to get yourself expelled.
todd: i could play the race card.
heather: but you're white...
todd: exactly! so i should be able to do whatever i want!
heather: yeah, i don't think it works that way...sorry.
todd: i think i want to be a professional solitaire player...
heather: oh yeah, that's the way to impress the ladies.
todd: well, i don't have to tell them what i do; i'll just say i'm a professional.
heather: and they'll be like, "a professional what?"
todd: damnit, this game sucks. i'm quitting.
heather: now, that's no way to be a professional.
trying out chris' online game:
todd: this is really hard
heather: is your head going to explode?
todd: yes, and someone's going to see it and throw up.
< later >
todd: i'm actually doing another puzzle. they're actually not that hard.
heather: cool.
todd: i guess you just have to be a genius to do them.
heather: your modesty is overwhelming.
todd: i know it is.
hehe. good times
